TMMS | Ep. 07 | Messy Melissa

This Podcast is the third installment of “The 5 Types Of Women You Do Not Want To Wife” series.  This episode focuses on Messy Melissa.  The series is designed to help good men avoid toxic women who they never will be happy with.

(TMMS) The Mentoring Mind Show is a transformational and entertaining podcast designed to help men entrepreneurs to Boss Their Brains.
We help men develop the mindset and skill sets to overcome the pain of their past so they can build a profitable business and attract the right wife into their life.

Thank you for listening to The Mentoring Mind Show Podcast.  If you received any value from this Podcast, please leave a comment. We’d love to hear from you.  If someone you know can benefit from listening to the Podcast, please share it with them.  And as always, What you think about, you bring about.  What you focus on expands.  And where attention goes, energy flows and results show.  You know what you gotta do now – Make It An Extraordinary Day!

Respectfully Submitted By,

Anthony Miller
Your Chief Transformational Life Coach
Owner, The Mentoring Mind Group, LLC

#BossYourBrain

 

 

TMMS | Ep. 02 | Destress Your Life

(TMMS) The Mentoring Mind Show Podcast is a transformational and entertaining podcast designed to help men entrepreneurs to Boss Their Brains.  We help you develop the mindset and skill sets to overcome the pain of your past so you can build a profitable business and attract the right wife into your life.

In the, “Destress Your Life,” episode of TMMS Show Podcast you will learn the following elements:

  • The internal determinants of stress
  • The external determinants of stress
  • The signs and symptoms of stress and of course
  • Solutions to stress that will work for you.

Thank you for taking the time to listen to the TMMS Podcast.  If  this episode resonated with you in any way, please like, share and leave a comment.  I would love to hear from you.  Your feedback is very valuable to me.

Yours in creating and sustaining an Extraordinary Life,

Anthony Miller
Your Chief Transformational Life Coach
CEO, The Mentoring Mind Group, LLC

#BossYourBrain

 

 

TMMS|Ep. 01|No More Loving You: What To Do If You’re On The Brink Of A Breakup

Welcome to TMMS (The Mentoring Mind Show Podcast). In this episode we aim to help you if you are in the midst of a breakup, separation or potential divorce.

In this installment, Your Chief Transformational Life Coach, Anthony Miller gives you pragmatic wisdom on how you can be victorious as you transition through this emotionally taxing situation.

By listening to this podcast you will equip yourself with positive communication skills, maintain inner peace and increase your ability to recognize Red Flags both now and in your future relationships.

The Mentoring Mind Group, LLC offers Premium Coaching Designed To Help You Master Your Business And Attract The Right Wife Into Your Life.

The Mentoring Mind Group , LLC thanks you for viewing this channel.

Don’t forget to subscribe!

The Common Denominator Is You

 

The Common Denominator Is You


This piece is geared and targeted to the man who has experienced multiple marriages and divorces.  I don’t know your psychological make-up, your emotional disposition or the intricate details and dynamics of any of your marriages that ended in divorce.  I do know; however, there is one common denominator – You.

If you are like the average American man, the very first thing you look for in a woman is how she looks.  Is the color of her hair brunette or blonde?  Are her curves deep and wide or narrow and sharp?  Do her teeth enhance her smile or make you turn away?  The second thing most western men try and do – as quickly as possible- is to taste and see if her sex is good.

Now, don’t get it twisted!  I too look before I leap.  However, my looking is not overly skewed on the woman’s external attributes.  And I believe this is where many of us tend to err.  We through caution to the wind when we get excited over what we see.  And man oh man, if the sexual chemistry is there, we just about lose all sense and sensibility.  What I mean by this is, we become so consumed with the next opportunity to ravish her body we ignore her Red Flags:

Her mandating you distance yourself from your children or friends.
Her lack of reciprocity.
The fact she doesn’t “Get You.”
The fact your closest confidant has repeatedly told you, “Bro. She’s not good for you.”
How her core values differ from yours like night and day.

And before you know it, you are down on one knee in a bar or club or packed house full of family and friends, with a ring inside of a black box, in the palm of your hand, about to ask the wrong woman for her hand in marriage.

For you, your divorces have not fully been the result of bad choices in women.  Your divorces have been the effects of poor Due Diligence.  But here’s the kicker, the average man, will forever fail to adequately complete the marital Due Diligence process.  Why?  Because he is unaware of the subconscious conflicts taking place within him.  In other words, you can say all day, you’re going to leave the Messy Melissa’s, The Selfish Cindy’s, The Rebellious Rhonda’s of the world alone.  But if you were raised by a Mother who emotionally abused you by telling you that you were good for nothing or who went out of her way to remind you how you would never amount to anything in life, “Just like your no good father,” then those words and the pejorative, egregious and malicious intensity associated with them are still impacting you.  They haven’t gone anywhere.  They live right beneath the surface of your conscious mind.  In case you didn’t know it, good brother, the subconscious mind controls ninety-seven percent of who we believe we are and how we show up in the world.

Now that you know better, it’s time to start doing better.  Let’s start by removing the stigma and shame connected to your divorces.  Yes.  They happened.  Yes. You said and did some things which contributed to the downfall of the relationship.  But, now, you are fully aware of what you never knew before.  You were a man oblivious to the unconscious conflicts raging on inside of him.  And you were a man who chose your previous wives based on a faulty American standard – physical appearance and sexual chemistry.

The best news in the world is you possess the power to attract the right wife into your life.  How will you do it?  There are three unique yet simple ways to get the girl of your dreams and live happily ever after:

Get clear on your Core Values so you can live an authentic and Extraordinary Life
Learn and utilize The Law of Reciprocity and
Learn to discern The Law of She Gets Me

I can almost guarantee you when you master and diligently apply these principles and laws to your life, the universe will reveal to you the most virtuous, prosperous, smartest, sexiest and spiritual wife you could’ve ever imagined.  It’s going to take some serious gut-wrenching work for you to get to your promise, but, hey, anything Extraordinary, is always worth fighting for.

If you are ready to begin a new life of happiness, self-confidence, freedom and redemption, feel free to contact me.  I am ready and eager to help you bring heaven down to earth!

Yours in creating an Extraordinary life,

Anthony Miller
Your Chief Transformational Life Coach
CEO, The Mentoring Mind Group, LLC
#BossYourBrain

 

 

 

 

 

3 Ways To Change


3 Ways To Change

Hello Good People –

I want to start this letter off with a quick quote: “Everyone thinks about changing the world, but very few people think about changing themselves.”

Here are eight things I came up with regarding change:

  1. Change requires a Disruption in your choice of words, thoughts and behaviors.
  2. Change is either a short-term, long-term or eternal process.  You get to decide.
  3. Change is necessary to grow, develop and mature as a productive person in society.
  4. If you are mad and angry more days than not – You gotta change!
  5. Change will lead you to more problems or your purpose.
  6. Change is responsible for all the miracles you have witnessed or been privy to.
  7. Change requires work, but it doesn’t have to be drastic.  All it usually takes is a minor  adjustment or correction in the way you think and do life
  8. Change only manifests with consistent and disciplined effort.

Before I let you go, I want to give you 3 Ways To Change:

  • The swift and complete removal of your subconscious self-limiting beliefs.
  • The development of new Neural Pathways and
  • Uncovering your Core Values and living them out in an intentional and authentic way

Today is as good a day as any to change!

If you have been contemplating changing how you show up in the world; More specifically, how you interact with and treat your spouse, call me or email me today.  We will come up with a plan to help you Ascend and be the Extraordinary man/husband you were designed to be.

Tis’ the season to change!

Yours in creating an Extraordinary Life,

Anthony Miller
Your Chief Transformational Life Coach
CEO, The Mentoring Mind Group, LLC

 

 

 

 

 

10-10-10

 

10-10-10


Hello Good People –

Do you have a problem expressing your anger appropriately?  Let me help you with you answer.  If you have engaged in any of the following behaviors or if someone you know has said or done any one of the things mentioned below in regards to you in the last twelve months, you have an anger management problem:

  • You have called your wife or intended spouse out of her name multiple times
  • The dog and cat run and hide whenever you come around
  • Your wife’s resumed smoking cigarettes because she’s stressed out by you
  • The furniture in your living room shakes at the sound of your voice
  • The people closest to you avoid you like the plague
  • You wake up angry
  • You go to bed angry
  • You feel angry most of the time
  • Someone has told you, “You have an anger problem”
  • You have been fired from jobs due violent outbursts towards co-workers
  • While driving, you habitually engage in rage like behaviors
  • When people disagree with your point of view you put them down
  • You have been divorced 3 or more times due to your aggressive behaviors
  • You don’t feel loved

No need to fret, I have a two step solution that will help you reduce the frequency, intensity and duration of your angry outbursts.

Step 1:  Remove Yourself From the Triggering Situation.

Don’t think about just do it.  Get out of there!  Get as far away as you can from the toxic source of your pain! Run for the hills if you have to.  Why?  Because you’re going to save yourself 100 days of sorrow.  I know you are tough.  I know you want to prove your point.  I know you don’t want to feel like you’ve punked out by leaving, but I’d much rather you be safe than sorry.  I’d much rather see you free than in prison.  I’d much rather you live and not die.

Step 2: 10-10-10.

When you leave the toxic environment or situation, I want you to find a safe space or go to your cool off spot.  If you’re out on the road, a safe space may be a well lit gas station.  A pet store.  A mall parking lot.  A friend’s driveway etc.  If you are at home and the triggering event occurred in the kitchen, you go to the basement.  If you’re really really heated go outside.  Once you’re there you can go on the porch, go to the garage, hop in the car (but don’t drive – no need for road rage) or you can take a long walk around the block.

Once you are comfortably in your safe spot, I want you to enact, 10-10-10.  Here is how I want you to state it:

  1. “In 10 minutes will I still be mad or hurt by what I heard Belinda say to me?”  Your answer may likely be, yes.  “In 10 minutes I’m still going to be mad as all get out at Belinda.  She took it too far on this one!”
  2. Since your answer is yes, I want you to proceed to the next increment of time which is hours.  Here’s what I want you to ask yourself:  “In 10 hours will I still be mad or hurt by what Belinda said to me?  Will it matter 10 hours from now?”  Let’s logically look at it.  If you are even remotely active, a lot of things can happen in your life in a ten hour span of time.  You could go to the office.  You could get a hair cut.  You could have lunch with a friend.  You could visit your child in college.  You might even wash your car.  The purpose for me mentioning this is that the activities during this ten hour time frame serve as disruptions to the intensity of your angry and hurt feelings.  Now, let’s go to the last increment of time which is days.
    3. If you believe you still need more time to deescalate, I want you to project your angry and hurt feelings out for 10 days.  Here is what you will need to say to ask yourself:  “In 10 days will I still be angry or hurt by what Belinda said to me?  Will I remember what happened?  Will it matter 10 days from now?”  From my years of teaching this anger management strategy, most people don’t need ten days to recover from their angry or hurt feelings particularly if the person who triggered them apologizes for their role in the conflict and ceases to repeat the same behavior that caused the emotional injury in the first place.

What 10-10-10 does is gives you time to put perspective on the triggering event.  Having the proper perspective gives you time to reflect on what’s truly important.  What we really want is for the person not to hurt us again.  Having a clear mind allows you to communicate your angry and hurt feelings to the “perpetrator” in an assertive manner.  I believe when a decent human being hears our pain they will do better by us.  This is why – men – when you choose a wife, she must already be virtuous and you must already be emotionally equipped to love her the way she needs to be loved.

I hope you found this content helpful.  If you believe it can help someone else, please share it with them.  And as always, what you think about you bring about.  And what you focus on expands.  And where attention goes, energy shows and results show.

Your in creating and sustaining an extraordinary life,

Anthony Miller
Your Chief Transformational Life Coach
CEO, The Mentoring Mind Group, LLC
#BossYourBrain

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Blocks

 

Blocks

Hello Good People –

Have you ever wondered why what you say you’re going to do and what actually gets done rarely lines up?  Do any of these sound familiar?

I’ll sign up for school next semester
It’s too cold outside today.  I’ll run tomorrow.
I’ll start working out the first of the year.
That’s it!  I’m done!  I’m through with her!
I’ll set up the appointment with that Life Coach next week.
I know I promised to cook him his favorite meal today…
They can keep this job!  I swear to god I ain’t going in a nan nother’ day.
As soon as I get home I’m letting him know – it’s over!
Alright!  this is my absolute last twinkie!
When my income tax comes I’m moving away from all these mofos!

These utterances sound good in the moment.  They make us feel energized and powerful.  And for all we know – what we said we’re going to do is a done deal.  But there’s something that won’t let us do it.  That, “thing,” always stops us dead in our tracks and subsequently derails us from making progress toward our goal.

The most likely reason why you struggle to do what you know you ought to be doing is because of the invisible battle going on inside of you.  It’s the struggle between the conscious vs. the subconscious mind.

Here’s the most important thing about the subconscious mind I want you to know:  It controls 97 percent of your behavior.

So, if your mother (or the person who raised you) told you you were, “good for nothing,” or said, “no one will ever like you, just like they never liked your no good father,” or “I should have aborted you when I had the chance,” and you internalized her words, you are going to have difficulty making decisions in adulthood.  Why?  Because subconsciously, the malignant melodies of your mother’s words are drowning out and distorting the words you are telling yourself today.

Coach Miller, how do I get past this?  How do I get unstuck?

Here’s one strategy to help you overcome the pain of your past (abuse, abandonment and rejection).  It’s called, Boss Your Brain.  Lately, I’ve been using this strategy as a hashtag in all of my social media posts.  If, #BossYourBrainworks for you, feel free to share it in your posts as well.  The method for using it is as follows:

While Looking In The Mirror, Reframe The Negative Words.  If your mother or caregiver said, “no one will ever like you, just like they never liked your no good father,” You will say, “I am fearfully and wonderfully made,” or “I can name 5 people who love me and I love them back,” or “Your words no longer have a place in my life, mom”

Repeat The Reframes Multiple Times Each Day.  The subconscious mind doesn’t really know the difference between what’s real and what’s imagined.  I’m all for imagining a happier and more vibrant and extraordinary life.  As you repeat these positive phrases i.e., affirmations, your subconscious mind will start believing what it hears you saying

Take A Specific Action.  For example, if you are telling yourself, “Your words no longer have a place in my life, mom.”  Introduce yourself to someone new.  Pick someone who “seems” approachable.  Remember their name and repeat it at least twice (Once in the beginning and once at the end of the conversation.  People love to hear their name) While you are talking, keep your head held high.  Speak with confidence.  Smile when appropriate.

See Your Success.  It doesn’t matter what specific action you take.  It doesn’t even matter if the other person or thing (signed up to begin taking piano lessons, etc.) you tried it on doesn’t work perfectly.  I want you to view the attempts and tries as successes.  Because when you view your thoughts, words and actions in an affirming manner, you release positive neurotransmitters i.e., serotonin and dopamine.  These neurotransmitters make us feel good.  They make us feel alive and they are the fuel we can use to raise the frequency of our vibrations.  Fact:  You do this often and frequent enough, your brain will literally form new neural pathways inside of your head.  These neural pathways are what produces new habits.  Extraordinary habits lead to an extraordinary life.

Bossing Your Brain is a powerful yet simple way to help you overcome the pain of your past so you can get the results you deserve out of life.

I hope you found this content to be helpful.  If you believe someone else can benefit from it, feel free to share it with them.

As always, what you think about you bring about.  What you focus on expands.  And where attention goes, energy flows and results show.  Make it an extraordinary day!

Yours in creating and sustaining an extraordinary life,

Anthony Miller
Your Chief Transformational Life Coach
CEO, The Mentoring Mind Group, LLC
#BossYourBrain


 

 

 

 

Proper Perspectives II: Manhood, Money & Marriage

 

Proper Perspectives II:  Manhood, Money & Marriage


Man, it feels good to interview a man on a mission to fulfill his earthly purpose.  I had the awesome pleasure of interviewing filmmaker, Mike Berry, of Skip Thomas Productions.

If your struggle with depression has caused you to turn your back on your purpose or promise listen to this Podcast.

Mike’s words left an indelible mark on me.  Here’s what I received as a result of paying close attention to what this brother had to say:

  • The Power of Setting Goals
  • The Power of Affirmations
  • The Power of Time Management
  • The Power of Choosing The Right Change Agent (Life Coach) To Help You Navigate Through the “Process”
  • The Power of Being Present In Your Marriage and Other Relationships
  • The Power of Having Multiple Streams of Income

I’m sure Mike’s words will benefit you in a meaningful way.  Click here to listen to the Podcast.

Yours In Creating An Extraordinary Life,

Anthony Miller
Your Chief Transformational Life Coach
CEO, The Mentoring Mind Group, LLC

 

 

Proper Perspectives: Manhood, Money & Marriage

 

Proper Perspectives: Manhood, Money & Marriage

Hello Good people –
I wanted to share with you this awesome interview I recently did with Coach Andre Morton.  Coach Andre is the proud owner of Rhythm and Stroke, LLC.  I can see he and I doing a lot of collaboration in the very near future.  He is a good brother (Listen to how he refers to the lady in his life) and has a huge heart for the community he serves.
To listen to the Podcast, click here.
The focus of this Podcast is to encourage you to raise your vibration.  I know each of you are at different points in the process of your life’s journey.  Some of you are seeking greater employment opportunities. Go get the money!  Go get the money! Others of you are rebranding your business, rehabbing your storefront or have recently incorporated.  Go hard after your dreams!
This Podcast will serve as a reminder to some and a wake-up call for others to get your mental house in order.
Listen here to Proper Perspectives: Manhood, Money & Marriage
Yours in creating an extraordinary life,
Anthony Miller
Your Chief Transformational Life Coach
CEO, The Mentoring Mind Group, LLC

Anger Management

 

The Top 3 Ground Rules For Successful Conflict Resolution

How do you handle conflict in your romantic relationship or marriage?  Is your manner of dealing with conflict moving you and your mate closer together or further apart?  The purpose of this piece is to expose you to the top 3 ground rules for effectively dealing with relationship conflict.  Because each of you have different likes and preferences, those likes and preferences will likely clash with those your spouse or significant other has.  What I’d you to be able to do is to respect your mates idiosyncrasies and have the right skill sets to resolve your conflicts in a win/win manner.  Feel free to print these ground rules.  Better yet, paste them to your relationship vision board.  As you’ve heard me say so many times before, repetition deepens the impression.  Meaning, the more you see, hear and do a thing the more likely it is to become a habitual part of your life.  Are you ready?  Here we go:

Ground Rule #1:  Use your time in “The Basement” wisely.  I like to describe The Basement as a period of time where individually life is grand.  Your life plans are manifesting. You are able to enjoy the fruits of your labor and you are at peace within yourself.  Relationship wise, you are meeting your mates love languages and she’s reciprocating.  She is making huge deposits into your love bank and you are responding likewise.  In The Basement the two of you are loving each other authentically and unconditionally.  Your actions are letting your mate know, ‘He gets me.’  Being in The Basement also allows you to engage in forward thinking. It affords you the opportunity to reflect on how much your mate means to you.  It gives you an emotional head start to feel how they may feel if you spoke to them – even when they have hurt you – in a tone of voice, at the proper time, that dripped with honor and reverence.

Ground Rule #2:  Agree to resolve your issues before the sun sets.  If you are more passive, non assertive or passive-aggressive in nature, this may be somewhat challenging for you to accomplish. You may not want to revisit the conflict.  It may be too painful or embarrassing.  It might even take you out of your comfort zone.  But guess what happens to issues that don’t get resolved?  They stay inside of you.  If they stay inside of you too long they end up in your vital organs i.e., your liver, your pancreas, your heart.  Have you ever heard of someone having liver or pancreatic cancer?  Has anyone in your family ever had a heart attack?  A lot of our physical issues can be avoided by promptly and consistently resolving our emotional pain directly with the person who caused them.  Make it your mission to get your grief out immediately.  Your individual health and the health of your relationship depends on it.

Ground Rule #3:  Resolve your conflict in The Alarm Stage.  The Alarm Stage is a moment in time where you realize that you are no longer in The Basement.  You have been TRIGGERED by what your spouse or romantic partner has said, has done or what she repeatedly does that works your nerves.  If your tendency is to be aggressive you may want to throw something at the trigger-puller.  If you’re more passive in nature, you will be tempted to shut down and give the trigger-puller the silent treatment.  Passive-aggressive folk will up the ante on the trigger-puller with their spicy brand of sarcasm.  But I want you to behave better than these types.  You can most assuredly do this by employing this one simple strategy- 10-10-10:

  • 10-10-10.  In order to use this method, you have to remove yourself from the trigger-puller’s presence.  Go to a safe spot in your home.  This is a location where your mate will not go or follow you to.  Once you are there, congratulate yourself for maintaining your composure.  Next, tackle the first 10.  Here is what you will say to yourself, “In 10 minutes will I still be hurt by what my mate just said, did or keeps on doing that works my nerves?”  More than likely, your answer will be “yes.”  Next step, tackle the second 10.  Here is what you will say to yourself, “In 10 hours will I still be hurt or irritated by what my mate said to me 10 minutes ago?”  Your answer could go either way.  Your answer may be “no” if you employ the following logic. “In 10 hours I will have gone to work, visited my mom and had a good work-out at the gym.”  But let’s say you’re still tipsy with anger and you answered “yes.”  Here’s what you will ask yourself.  “In 10 days can I still see myself being hurt and frustrated with my mate over what she said or did to me 10 minutes ago?  Additionally, I want you to ask yourself these two all important questions:
    • “If I hurt or offended my mate would I want her to forgive me?” and
    • “Is it possible I may have said or done something to her 10 minutes ago which caused her to aim her trigger toward me in the first place?”  The purpose of 10-10-10 is to give yourself some emotional and physical separation from the triggering event.  The forced separation puts you in a position to calm down and do something appropriate with the negative emotions you are experiencing.  Once you have calmed down you are now able to think clearly and rationally about the trigger-pulling event.  This clarity of emotions and thoughts will give you the courage to have empathy about your mates thoughts and feelings.  As you think in a selfless fashion, you gain the confident to be deliberate and intentional as a problem solver. Confidence is contagious.  When your significant other believes you’re focused on solving the problem as opposed to blaming her, she will support your efforts.  The more win/wins you rack up, the more sunsets you’ll experience together.

I hope you found the information presented in this piece helpful.  If you believe it can help someone else, please share it with them.  And as always, what you think about you bring about.  What you focus on expands and where attention goes, energy flows and results show.

Make it an extraordinary day!

Anthony Miller – Your Chief Transformational Life Coach & Professional Clinical Counselor